10 February 2008

troubling transitions

Sonday again, after a somewhat rough weekend. Oliver has always had trouble with transition. His parents are getting better at what he needs to skate through them more smoothly. The timer has become our friend. Oliver even asks for it sometimes.

For some reason though, we have issues when CD returns from a trip. Leaving doesn't seem to be much of a problem. The first day following a departure isn't always a walk in the park but it's nothing like the first day or two after he returns. Most of the time we can forget Oliver is technically "a terrible two". Not so this weekend. At Music Together on Saturday he was frequently out of control, feeding off the two boys who spend most of the class completely out of their minds. 

And then there were the meltdowns, the screaming, hitting, kicking, thrashing meltdowns. I lost count of how many there were. Most of his sentences now begin with, "I want". If the answer isn't "Yes, my liege." we get a meltdown. If he doesn't say "please" I ignore him completely. If he does say "please" but I still can't grant the wish of the moment, I am trying really hard to not play into the meltdown. When I needed to get him dressed today, after getting him upstairs and on his changing table (not without a fight), he was making it impossible to change his diaper. I just walked away and told him to let me know when he was ready. Then I went into my room to fold laundry. It was only about 15 seconds before he called out to me that he was ready. This strategy seems to be effective and get things under control quickly and with a minimum of trauma on both sides.

The weather today didn't help. It was cold and windy and snowy so we didn't get outside. I should have bundled him up and taken him out anyway, if only for a few minutes, but the windchill was below zero. It's now in the single digits, without the wind. brrrr...

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