22 January 2009

they call it a play date

Tomorrow morning Oliver has a playdate at a private school. Except it feels more like an audition. I'll be in a nearby room, pretending to be calm but trying very hard not to throw up. I have been trying to convince myself for the last two months that it doesn't matter, and it was working pretty well until yesterday. I learned two things. A child in the recent past barfed all over said playdate and was admitted anyway. That was very calming. And then I found out about another child who was charming and smart, not unlike Oliver, who was not admitted. It was a quick trip down a slippery slope to hysteria. Due to its proximity to a girls' school, this school is pretty competitive for boys. And since they value diversity, charming and smart white boys can be over-represented in the applicant pool. Then there are the spots taken by younger siblings of current students. When the starting point is space for 16 students, my little panic attack doesn't seem nearly so irrational, except the part where I starting plotting ways to highlight the fact that Oliver is half South Asian.

Here's the part where I convince myself to go back to thinking it doesn't matter.

  • Oliver really is smart and charming. I have yet to find a teacher who didn't gush all over him.
  • We have a plan B and it's not bad.
  • We even have a plan C that's pretty good.
and most importantly,
  • I don't want to be part of a club that doesn't want my kids
There. I feel better. Maybe they will have the coffee spiked with just a little bit of xanax.


Karen said...


Second? I wouldn't want my kid to be somewhere that he's not accepted. I'd feel he was always mistreated, looked down on, or pushed aside. Plans B or C are alternatives, not lesser options.

Third? He'll do fine.

KG said...

So - I saw on Twitter/Plurk that it went well. Which is good - but really - do you WANT your kid to be involved with such snobbery? Eww! They reject children? I would never go to such a place.

That being said, I hope you had a happy birthday! :-)

Elizabeth said...

Hi! I just wanted to say I got the card this week! Thanks so much! Loved the picture of the kiddos!

Jen said...

Hi, First off, sorry I didn't make it to the Burgh dinner last night. Hope you all had fun.

I wanted to ask what school this was at, and ask your impressions. You can email me at jenrantsraves@yahoo.com to keep it private, if you want.